What does your giving say about you?

It's been all over the Internet today.  A (female) pastor in St. Louis wrote on a receipt at Applebee's "I give god 10%, why do you get 18"  You can read the story here.

I'm not going to talk about if Applebee's was in the wrong to fire the server.  I am, however going to talk about the actions of this woman who calls herself a pastor.

My very first thought was, "If this woman is the pastor, what do the people in her church act like?"  After all, this is the example they have, their leader, their spiritual mentor.  It makes me shudder to think about it!

I have a friend who returned from a discipleship training course a few years back.  He was at it for two years, and he has always impressed me with his tipping as well as his attitude towards wait staff in a restaurant.  One night the two of us were at Denny's for over an hour after the rest of the group left and because we were there so long, he left a tip equal to his order.  I'm sure the waitress didn't mind us there anyway as it wasn't busy.  He has always said, though, one things he learned at the discipleship training was, "People know why you are here.  They know you are Christians.  Tip generously."

I've heard so many complaints that the people who are the stingiest in tips is the groups from churches.  In fact, one man in my church said he quit going out to eat with the group because he was embarrassed at how few of the younger people left tips.  If you can't afford to leave a tip, you can't afford to go out and eat.

Luke 6:38 says:  Give, and you will receive. Your gift will return to you in full—pressed down, shaken together to make room for more, running over, and poured into your lap. The amount you give will determine the amount you get back (NLT)

It sometimes feels like the rest of the world knows a concept that hasn't always penetrated the church:  GIVING HELPS US!  One of the best books I read in 2012 was  Thou Shall Prosper: Ten Commandments for Making Money by Rabbi Daniel Lapin.   In that book, he discusses how giving can actually help increase our ability to receive more money.  Not as in the "seed money" I often hear talked about in church (meaning 10% of the money you hope to receive back.  The concept is if you need $100 for car repairs, you put $10 extra in the offering as your "seed" to receive the $100.  I cannot find that supported Biblically, but it is practiced among some Christians.)  Instead what Rabbi Lapin discusses in this book is something that really should be common sense.  If you are a giving person, you will often make contacts who help you in the future.  

Many people know I enter contests and sweepstakes as a hobby.  When I went to the convention this past summer, I saw how sharing reaps more rewards.  I won an iPad because someone shared with me.  I tried to give the lady some money who shared with me, but she wouldn't take it.  But you can better believe if she ever asks me for a vote in a contest, she has mine!  I saw this principle at work in hanging out with a certain sweepstakes club because they were all winners, but all shared what they found with one another.  It didn't used to be uncommon if you won a big prize (say $1,000 or more) to send the person who shared that sweepstakes with a newsletter $50 or more -- just for sharing even though you did the work to win.  Most people share even more if someone actually helps.  Depending on the amount of help given, most share MUCH more, that's usually just for someone who has only told the other person about the contest. 

When you share, it's a win-win for everyone.  When you stay tight fisted, everyone loses.  It's true in sweepstakes, and it's true in life.

I believe Luke 6:38 isn't just for Christians, but for everyone.  If someone is generous with me, I feel like doing more for them.  The people I have been generous with are there to help when I need it.  Someone who I feel hasn't been generous?  Whatever I have to give can be given to someone else, and if I'm not generous with people, I can't expect them to be there when I need something. 

I believe in not being stingy, and not being resentful in giving or helping others.  In positive terms that means sharing freely and happily.  If you, like the pastor in the Applebee's case feel you shouldn't have to because you are a Christian, there is Scripture to back up giving freely and happily.  

The Utter Relief of Holiness Review and Givewaway

The Utter Relief of Holiness by John Eldredge

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


I have been a longtime fan of John Eldredge.  I would almost venture to say he is my favorite author.  At the very least he is the author of one of my favorite books.  So when I heard he had written The Utter Relief of Holiness, I couldn’t wait to read it. 

Like his other books, Elderdge takes the topic and presents it in a clear but challenging way with great application.  However, as excited as I was about this book, it didn’t quite live up to my expectations.  I wanted to LOVE this book.  As it was, I only liked it.   I believe his previous writing had me spoiled and set my expectations a little too high.  However, if you are a new to Eldredge’s books, you will likely really enjoy this book.

I did jot down several quotes in my reading notebook.  My favorite is this:

“People who knew themselves to be anything but holy found the holiness of Jesus winsome, open-armed, and utterly compelling.  Is this how you have understood holiness?  It changes everything when you do.”  (page 38)

Having grown up in a church that took a theological idea to extremes that we could be sinless in this life, I almost wondered if Eldredge took the idea of being able to achieve holiness to extremes.  Can we really be so holy that we “simply don’t struggle with whatever it is that haunts you, it’s not an issue.  That’s the utter relief of holiness.  That’s what happens with the life of Jesus invades yours.”  (page 43)  It’s a great thought.  It would be wonderful if I truly believed it, but I sit back and I wonder.  The Apostle Paul had a thorn in his flesh.  Although we aren’t told what is was.  Perhaps it was a physical malady, but what if it was a sin he struggled with?  We don’t know and that leaves me pondering if holiness the way that Elderedge depicts is really something we can achieve this side of heaven.

That said, I also think it’s a great book on the topic.  There is a lot of Scripture contained in it, so it would make a great book from which to do a personal Bible study.  Because of the amount of Scripture, it would be ideal to use in a Bible study or Sunday School class.

Do I recommend this book?  Yes.  Will it be one of the favorite books I’ve read this year?  Most likely.  Did it live up to what I’ve thought of his previous books?  No.  Worth the read?   Absolutely.

You can learn more about the book and connect with the author at these links:

Website: http://www.ransomedheart.com/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ransomedheartministries
Twitter: https://twitter.com/ransomedheart/
Watch the book trailer:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tdVkECNOEp0
Purchase at Amazon:
The Utter Relief of Holiness: How God's Goodness Frees Us from Everything that Plagues Us


Disclosure of Material Connection:  I received one or more of the products or services mention above for free in the hope that I would mention it on my blog.  Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers.  I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255:  “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising”

I have a copy of The Utter Relief of Holiness to giveaway.  The giveaway is open to those 18 or older, and this is an INTERNATIONAL giveaway, so you do NOT need to live in the United States! Ends 1/29 at 11:59 pm Eastern Time.

 a Rafflecopter giveaway

My Top Non-Fiction Picks for 2012

In 2012, I only read 61 books, this is down from previous years.  I tend to read much more non-fiction and here are my picks of what I read in 2012, listed alphabetically.

Arbitrage: The authoritative guide on how it works, why it works, and how it can work for you is a great book on how to use your phone to find things to sell online.

The Art of Neighboring: Building Genuine Relationships Right Outside Your Door  This is a great book on relationship building and why you need neighbors.

The Devil in Pew Number Seven is a book you can only wish were fiction. 

The Prize Winner of Defiance, Ohio: How My Mother Raised 10 Kids on 25 Words or Less is my favorite book of all time, and I re-read it this year, so of course it will get a mention.

Sister of Silence is a book about domestic violence and how she escaped.

Success Is Not an Accident: Change Your Choices; Change Your Life is a great read about choices and how to achieve your goals.

Thou Shall Prosper: Ten Commandments for Making Money is a great book on how to make money and the importance of connections.

 Winning the Food Fight: Victory in the Physical and Spiritual Battle for Good Food and a Healthy Lifestyle was written by the brother of a friend of mine from college and well worth the read.

 When Helping Hurts: How to Alleviate Poverty Without Hurting the Poor . . . and Yourself is an excellent book I believe all churches should have all who want to go on a mission trip read.

The Wishing Year: A House, a Man, My Soul A Memoir of Fulfilled Desire was a fun and interesting read.

Etched Upon My Heart Review and Giveaway

Etched...Upon My Heart: What We Learn and Why We Never Forget by Jill Kelly

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


Etched . . . Upon My Heart:  What We Learn and Why We Never Forget is a book that literally brought me to tears.  Jill Kelly is wife of former Buffalo Bill quarterback Jim Kelly, and mother to two girls, to whom she dedicated this book, and one son, Hunter, who passed away at age eight from a rare disease.

In this book, she takes eight ideas / qualities and expounds on them from her life experiences.  She discusses losing Hunter to Leukodystrophy and the challenges that surrounded that as well as other life challenges.  They range from love to death, and while telling these stories she bares her heart.  The stories are ones any woman can relate to, or at the least empathize with her.  She recalls memories that will bring a smile to your face, such as when her daughter was insist that her husband pray to become a Christian.  Some stories make you wonder how you would feel -- what if you organized a fundraiser in honor of your child who passed away and saw his picture on flyers which at the end of the day were discarded? She tells stories of hope.  When she was doing a Bible study and couldn’t remember when she had been betrayed, healing emanated from that recollection.

This is a unique book.  It’s not a devotional (although it could be used as such.)  Nor is it a Bible study.  It’s someone sharing from their heart, some of the deepest things that as I read it, I repeatedly thought to myself, “If this happened to me, I don’t know if I could ever share this with the world.” 

I think this would make an excellent book for a book club, women’s group, or even a Sunday School class.  Through a group discussion, you might even be inspired to write your own legacy to your children of God’s love and faithfulness in your life by telling your story.  I can’t recommend this book enough.

Connect with the author:
Website:  http://www.jillk.org/
Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/pages/Jill-Kelly-AuthorSpeaker/322884036164
Twitter:  https://twitter.com/hjkforever
Purchase at Amazon: Etched...Upon My Heart: What We Learn and Why We Never Forget


Disclosure of Material Connection:  I received one or more of the products or services mention above for free in the hope that I would mention it on my blog.  Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers.  I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255:  “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising”

I have a copy of Etched Upon My Heart to giveaway.  The giveaway is open to those 18 or older, and this is an INTERNATIONAL giveaway, so you do NOT need to live in the United States! Ends 1/29 at 11:59 pm Eastern Time.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

The 5 Money Personalities : Speaking the Same Love and Money Language Book Review

FTC disclaimer:  I received this book in order to do a review.  All opinions are my own.  This post contains affiliate links.


In The Five Money Personalities: Speaking the Same Love and Money Language, Scott and Bethany Palmer -- also known as "The Money Couple" -- discuss the traits that each person may have that can affect the relationships of those around them.  When about half of marriages end in divorce, and money is the number one issue that couples argue about, I believe this is a very important book for everyone to read.  I’m single, but it helped me understand others who don’t have my money personality.

One of the things they discuss in this book is how to handle it if you have married someone with an opposite personality.  Or what if your secondary money personality trait is opposite of your main one!  That can actually be quite common, and leave that person fretting about decisions.

One of the neat things is they have resources on their website to compliment the book.  It was no surprise to me when I took the quiz that my primary personality was “saver”.  I remember as a child my grandparents giving me a jar full of coins for my birthday thinking I’d use them to play video games.  Instead I took them to the bank and deposited the nearly $40 in change in my savings account.  My secondary trait is “security seeker”.  This is something that took a long conversation with someone recently when he was asking why debt bothered me.  Don’t know how to start a conversation like that? It’s needed and this book has advice on how to broach the tough topics of how your spouse wastes money in your eyes. 

Also included in the book is an appendix of how to survive live with someone with that other money personality (or even your own!)  If you’re a spender you might need to reign yourself in come birthdays or Christmas, but the saver might need a little help spending their hard earned money on other people.

I highly recommend this book to everyone.  It gives a lot of insight to why we handle money the way we do, and I believe if read and the principles in it were applied, it could save a lot of marriages.

You can purchase this book at Amazon.

Goodbye, Bingo

Just over five months ago I adopted a little guy from a guinea pig rescue.  He was an absolute perfect fit for our family and dearly loved by us and Fuzzy.  (We needed a friend for Fuzzy as he lost a cage mate on June 14th.)  Bingo developed a pocket of infection on his cheek, and even though I took him to the vet and it was lanced and he was on antibiotics he didn't last but a week after I found it.  He had been brought to the rescue by someone who got too many guinea pigs to take care of them.  He was covered in so much tar from cigarette smoke that it took three baths for him to get clean from that.  I may have only had him five months, but it was a happy five months for him.   I will dearly miss the little fellow.

Bingo 

September 24, 2009

December 27, 2012

Making Christmas 2013 more affordable

Have you started your Christmas shopping yet?  If not, you might want to think about it.  This is one way I have saved money in the past on Christmas expenses.

This year, we spent about $400 on Christmas (granted, we had no meal as it was just my mother and me.  I ate fish sticks and she wasn't hungry.)  But for that, we got about $1500 of stuff.  (And $288 of that was for a new kitchen table and chairs I bought online on Black Friday.)

Start shopping NOW for Christmas gift wrap, cards, decorations, and the like.  These go down dramatically after Christmas, and one year I was buying Christmas cards for 10 cents for a box of ten.  I didn't need thousands of Christmas cards, but I could use the envelopes (cheaper than a #10) and made postcards out of the fronts of the cards.

For gifts, I used gift cards I had won entering sweepstakes.  I saved them until I found sales, then combined sales with online coupons.  For instance, I wanted to get my mother a new telephone for the landline.  I waited until it was on sale.  Then there was a $10 off $50 purchase coupon, free shipping if you spent $50, and I had a gift card I won.  Even without the gift card, I would have paid about $40 for an $80 phone.

If an item doesn't have to be new, watching for things at garage sales can be a big money saver.  My aunt has been one to like local history items, and one year I bought her a magazine from the 1960s with a local story in it.  Cost?  Ten cents.  She didn't know I paid ten cents rather than the $10 or more it was going for on eBay.  This works well for things that are no longer made, out of print, antiques, etc.

A friend made my mother a gift.  To buy something similar would have been over $50.  For less than 30 minutes she was able to make something almost identical (but better for my mother) with about a $5 investment.  Not only that, it's more personal because it was handmade.

For some friends of mine, I entered a lot of blog giveaways and won some great stuff for them.  Everything from a handmade scarf to toys for their kids.  Another thing I'm giving those friends is a box of Hostess Zingers.  They live in Russia and were not here when Hostess announced they were closing.  They are in for the holidays, so I have a box of Zingers to give them so they can say farewell to the American icon.  Again, not expensive, but thoughtful.  (Of course, this is the same friend who would become nostalgic over vanilla wafers, a treat he never especially liked, just because they don't sell them in Russia!)

One way to make Christmas a little more affordable is to figure out NOW what you want to (and can afford) to spend next Christmas.  Divide that by 12.  Now set aside that much money each month for Christmas (or if you can find good deals, go ahead and spend.  For instance, buy wrapping paper, cards, etc. NOW.)   Also, buy stamps now.  They will go up next month and since first class stamps are now "Forever" stamps, they will be useable next year with no additional postage. 

Good luck on making 2013 more affordable!  :)

Book review: The Art of Neighboring

The Art of Neighboring: Building Genuine Relationships Right Outside Your Door by Jay Pathak

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


The Art of Neighboring is a Christian book.  That much is clear.  However, I was impressed with its lack of "get to know your neighbors so you can tell them about Jesus" approach in this book.  It's still mentioned, but author Jay Pathak discusses the difference between an ulterior motive and an ultimate motive and says our ultimate motive in all relationships is to share our faith. 

This is a great read for anyone who has neighbors.  (And that is the majority of us.)  Gone are the days of going next door to borrow a couple eggs, we usually just hop in the car and go to the store.  This book gives ideas on how to create community within your community.  He gives examples of how he's done it where he lives, such as an impromptu smores making and going door to door to invite the neighbors. 

Also, he discusses sticky situations and how to set boundaries in such instances.  He gives a detailed story of what happened to he and his wife with one neighbor.  After all, many times there will be someone who wants to take advantage of our kindness, and there are times we need to say no to others!

In the end what happens when we take care of those around us?  We can go looking right on our block for help, be it shoveling show, babysitting, or other things. We, in turn, can gift our neighbors with something we can do for them and relationships are strengthened and everyone benefits!

Book Review: Uncompromising

Uncompromising: A Heart Claimed By a Radical Love by Hannah Farver
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I am no stranger to Christian books for teen girls. I’ve occasionally read them since I was that age over twenty years ago. So many times they are encouragement that God still loves you even if you have a bad hair day. I was very pleased and I must admit a bit surprised that Uncompromisng: A Heart Claimed By a Radical Love by Hannah Farver was a deep book for girls. Of course, she discusses beauty and the implications of focusing on the outward appearance, but she puts it into perspective with Scripture.

One thing I really appreciated was her mention of expository Bible Study. If there is one thing I wish she would have elaborated on in this book, it is this topic. Many adults don’t even know there is a way to study the Bible besides letting it fall open to a passage and seeing what is there and calling that their “word for the day”. Hannah encourages in depth Bible study, and that is rare to find in any book, especially one for teens.

She discusses all the hot topics of teen girls. Yes, that includes guys. She doesn’t encourage dating over courtship or vice versa, she allows that decision up to the reader. She talks about the need for community and female friendship -- including Christian woman who are older than you so you can learn from them.

Her book is written in a down to earth way. It is far from preachy. Neither do you feel she puts herself on a pedestal as having all the answers. In fact, as an adult, the biggest flaw I found with this book is it seemed a little too much like a casual conversation. I understand she wanted to make jokes, and that is fine, but the way they were worked into the book disrupted the flow of my reading occasionally, but that could just be a personality quirk of mine.

There are 24 pages of text, 10 pages of composing the checklists “Am I ready for Marriage” and “Modesty Checklist” and 10 pages of a study guide. I believe this book would work well with a teen girls’ discipleship group. With 12 chapters, it could also work well with a Sunday School class.

I highly recommend this book for teen girls, especially those in the younger and middle teen years.

You can purchase the book here:  Uncompromising at Moody Publishers

FTC disclosure: I received a copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review. The opinions are my own.

Razor Reindeer

I bought a bag of Christmas ornaments at a thrift shop yesterday.  I saw one I wanted, and while I was looking at the rest I pulled this out.

Who would make a Christmas ornament out of a razor?  That seems a little dangerous if you have children around!  Who came up with such an idea anyway?