FTC disclaimer: This is a sponsored post. All opinions are my own.
U.S. Cellular offers a FREE PRINTABLE Parent Child agreement to help you discuss safety of the Internet, cell phone usage, limits, and courtesy with your teen or tween. You don't even need to be a U.S. Cellular customer to access this, although I have been for 10 years and highly recommend them.
I have recently upgraded to an iPhone through U.S. Cellular. It's a fantastic phone, and I'm so happy that U.S. Cellular finally started selling the iPhone last year. I've been an Apple girl for a few years, and it felt awkward to have my computer and tablet on one system, and my phone on another. Now everything all works on the same platform! It's so much easier to transfer photos to my computer, and I didn't even have the learning curve that often is associated with a new phone. It takes great photos and I couldn't be happier with it!
Wednesday, April 16, 2014
Saturday, April 5, 2014
Book Review: Girl At the End of the World
FTC disclaimer: I received a copy of this book from the publisher for review purposes. All opinions are my own. This post does contain affiliate links.Girl at the End of the World: My Escape from Fundamentalism in Search of Faith with a Future
The judgment may be at hand, so the church she grew up in made absolutely sure that everyone was ready for Revelation to be played out at any moment. Setting up secret hiding places was normal. As well as, in later years, learning how wearing a thong was a sin because God would see it. After all, girls should be modest. But hopefully by that time, the children would have had all the sin spanked out of them and they would be following what was taught.
Or not. When Elizabeth Esther goes to high school, which is a public school after years in her church school, she discovers boys. And defiles herself before marriage by doing the shameful act of kissing her secret boyfriend. After all, dating isn't allowed, only courtship. Even her clothes in sizes too big for modesty sake doesn't keep the boys -- or friends -- away. It is in high school she decides she wants to go to college -- to escape. Of course, this idea doesn't fly with her dad, who as in most patriarchal systems, calls the shots for his household.
She does escape, obviously, or she wouldn't have told the tale. While I didn't grow up in a church this abusive, several things echoed true for me. I remember thinking as a child I needed to find a hiding place to store a Bible because we were taught as small children at church that the Russians were coming and they were going to kill all Christians and destroy all Bibles, so that is why we needed to memorize Scripture. (I didn't realize that if we were dead, it wouldn't have mattered how much we had memorized.)
This is an excellent book for those who have come out of any type of abusive church situation. Learning to think for yourself after a situation like that is not just difficult, but frightening. There's always the "What If They Are Right?" question stuck in the back of your brain wondering if you are the one who is wrong and not them. It's also a fascinating read for anyone who wants to see what the insides of a cult are like. It is a book that you can't put down. It's a tale of survival, hope, and escape. She learned to think for herself and no longer be brainwashed.
I loved Girl At The End of The World.
Connect with the author:
Read part of the book here:
Friday, April 4, 2014
Seven Quick Takes Friday in Rhyme
1.
Thoughts were escaping me,
A fun blog post what could it be?
My boyfriend suggested I should do a hip-hop rap,
He can be a pretty clever chap.
So here it is, all in verse,
Trust me, my prose can be even worse.
2.
Last night was an annual book sale,
I go every year without fail.
This year bought 50 from Childhood of Famous Americans set,
Read half of them in my childhood I bet.
I was quite the reader even back then,
I can't wait to read them once again.
3.
Spring may be here, I really hope so,
Although the forcast says we may get snow.
We went geocaching earlier this week,
Coudn't find one that was located by a creek,
But this was behind a Wal-Mart store,
Beautiful scenery enjoyed before we cached more.
4.
Spring cleaning, chores, not so much fun,
The dryer vent is being cleaned while there is still sun,
Vacuum filter needs washed, stuff priced for a garage sale,
This stuff will get done, we cannot fail.
eBay mailings taken to the post office each day,
We ship as soon as our buyers make time to pay.
5.
Two scares from the doctor in the last week,
More testing I am going to have to seek,
Hope all comes back from that okay,
And hope $800 is all I have to pay
For more tests to make sure that all is fine,
Gotta keep healthy, this body of mine.
6.
We had company twice as of late,
Hospitality is an enjoyable trait,
We bought a guest book for everyone to sign in,
Memory of their visit permanent with a pen.
For us to look back on years down the road,
No matter where we may abode.
7.
Trying to eat more healthily,
I am now drinking some black tea,
And I hate chocolate -- really I do!
Dark chocolate is supposedly good for you.
Been eating a square once every day,
Still doesn't make the bad taste of it go away.
There you have it, a few minutes of my time,
And my Seven Quick Takes Friday all in rhyme!
For more Quick Takes Friday (which aren't in rhyme) Visit ConversionDiary.com
Thoughts were escaping me,
A fun blog post what could it be?
My boyfriend suggested I should do a hip-hop rap,
He can be a pretty clever chap.
So here it is, all in verse,
Trust me, my prose can be even worse.
2.
Last night was an annual book sale,
I go every year without fail.
This year bought 50 from Childhood of Famous Americans set,
Read half of them in my childhood I bet.
I was quite the reader even back then,
I can't wait to read them once again.
3.
Spring may be here, I really hope so,
Although the forcast says we may get snow.
We went geocaching earlier this week,
Coudn't find one that was located by a creek,
But this was behind a Wal-Mart store,
Beautiful scenery enjoyed before we cached more.
4.
Spring cleaning, chores, not so much fun,
The dryer vent is being cleaned while there is still sun,
Vacuum filter needs washed, stuff priced for a garage sale,
This stuff will get done, we cannot fail.
eBay mailings taken to the post office each day,
We ship as soon as our buyers make time to pay.
5.
Two scares from the doctor in the last week,
More testing I am going to have to seek,
Hope all comes back from that okay,
And hope $800 is all I have to pay
For more tests to make sure that all is fine,
Gotta keep healthy, this body of mine.
6.
We had company twice as of late,
Hospitality is an enjoyable trait,
We bought a guest book for everyone to sign in,
Memory of their visit permanent with a pen.
For us to look back on years down the road,
No matter where we may abode.
7.
Trying to eat more healthily,
I am now drinking some black tea,
And I hate chocolate -- really I do!
Dark chocolate is supposedly good for you.
Been eating a square once every day,
Still doesn't make the bad taste of it go away.
There you have it, a few minutes of my time,
And my Seven Quick Takes Friday all in rhyme!
For more Quick Takes Friday (which aren't in rhyme) Visit ConversionDiary.com
Thursday, April 3, 2014
Spring Geocaching in West Virginia
Because of our harsh winters, it's not very feasible to go geocaching in West Virginia during the winter. Now that spring is here (I hope!), we've caught three geocaches in the last week. I'm pretty new at caching, only 27 found so far, but I'm enjoying it, it's getting me outdoors and I'm finding some interesting places I didn't know existed.
Here's a few photos of my latest adventures:
This is at the Battle of Rowlesburg Cache. This is part of the WV Civil War Trail Caches and if you collect 8 stamps, you can turn it in for a special geocoin. I've always wondered where the Battle of Rowlesburg was. My great-great-grandfather was to be guarding the railroad, but legend has it that something happened and they allowed the Confederates by and they had to chase them most of the way to Pittsburgh!
Believe it or not, this is a Cache at a Walmart! Wal-Mart caches often have a bad rap, but look at the scenery! Just beautiful.
This is from the Brown's Park Cache. I have been past this park hundreds of times, but have never stopped. It's a fun park, and again, as you can see, a beautiful area!
Here's a few photos of my latest adventures:
This is at the Battle of Rowlesburg Cache. This is part of the WV Civil War Trail Caches and if you collect 8 stamps, you can turn it in for a special geocoin. I've always wondered where the Battle of Rowlesburg was. My great-great-grandfather was to be guarding the railroad, but legend has it that something happened and they allowed the Confederates by and they had to chase them most of the way to Pittsburgh!
Believe it or not, this is a Cache at a Walmart! Wal-Mart caches often have a bad rap, but look at the scenery! Just beautiful.
This is from the Brown's Park Cache. I have been past this park hundreds of times, but have never stopped. It's a fun park, and again, as you can see, a beautiful area!
Wednesday, April 2, 2014
Book Review: The Question that Never Goes Away
The Question That Never Goes Away by Zondervan PublishingMy rating: 5 of 5 stars
Philip Yancey was required reading in a Freshman Bible class in college, but it's because he has good things to say. Twenty years later, he has written a sequel to Where is God When It Hurts (which eBooks were given away free of that book right after the Newtown tragedy). His latest book, The Question That Never Goes Away revisits pain and suffering.
The timing for me to review this book (I received a copy free from the publisher) was unfortunately all too appropriate. During the time I read it, my mother got pneumonia, was released from the hospital and seemed to be doing okay considering she had a chronic illness and passed away suddenly -- while I was at church, no less! Then there was more drama that went on afterwards than in a junior high school. While one person passing away is not like the war in Bosnia, the Newtown tragedy, or the Fukishima disaster that Yancey discusses, it is my very own heartbreak.
Obviously, there is no answer. If you have ever spent time with a pre-schooler, the question "Why?" is asked incessantly. I think as we age, we no longer ask why the sky is blue, but "Why did my mother die the way she did?" "Why me? Why did my test results come back like this?" "Why am I 38 and still single?" All are questions I have asked. I think in some ways, we are still toddlers asking questions that really can't be answered. The best we can sometimes do is just go on.
The spoiler to this book is this: There is no real answer to Why. Just like a child doesn't accept "Because I said so" we won't ever accept any answer as to why a plane disappeared because, now, the technical part is not what we are looking for -- we want to know the reasons that lives were changed.
This book may leave you with more questions as to why things happen, but at the same time it's comforting. It shows the hope left in the aftermath. Bad things happen, and will continue to happen. But how we respond to our own suffering and the suffering of others is key. A church has organized ongoing counseling for those affected in Newtown. There are beacons of hope like flowers shooting up through an area damaged by forest fires.
While this book won't give you answers, I highly recommend it, and I do believe it will be comforting if you are asking "Why"?
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookLook Bloggers book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
Purchase it here:
Wednesday, March 26, 2014
Sabi Pill Cutter Review
Disclosure: I got this product as part of an advertorial.
When I received the Sabi Chop Cut-and-Take Pill Splitter
I wondered how well it would work. It is a plastic circular contraption about two inches in diameter. I wondered how well plastic could chop a pill. The instructions read to place it on a flat surface and use your palm to press down on the top. Sounds simple enough.
Well, when I applied to review this my mother was alive and was taking a number of medications. I thought this would be useful to have around. Although I am strong enough to use this, she would not have been. So if you are thinking of buying this for someone who is weak due to illness, you may be the one who has to use this for them and chop their pills for them
Additionally, it works very will with the type of pill it is intended for -- a long, oblong pill. You have to very carefully place it in the cutter or you won't get a 50% cut on it, but it works very well for these.
If you are planning on using a round, small, or other shaped pill, you will not want to use this cutter as all it creates is a mess. (Again this is not the type of pill it is intended for use cutting.) However, I know for myself, do I really need an extra pill cutter around? This isn't a common sized pill for myself (and like I said, my mother passed between the time I applied to review this and the time the item arrived for review.) Even with her pills, I'm not sure I would recommend this as it only cuts one type of pill and has to be pressed so firmly with the palm of the hand. But if you have difficulty cutting long large oblong pills, this is the pill cutter for you.
I received one or more of the products mentioned above for free using Tomoson.com. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers.
When I received the Sabi Chop Cut-and-Take Pill Splitter
I wondered how well it would work. It is a plastic circular contraption about two inches in diameter. I wondered how well plastic could chop a pill. The instructions read to place it on a flat surface and use your palm to press down on the top. Sounds simple enough.Well, when I applied to review this my mother was alive and was taking a number of medications. I thought this would be useful to have around. Although I am strong enough to use this, she would not have been. So if you are thinking of buying this for someone who is weak due to illness, you may be the one who has to use this for them and chop their pills for them
Additionally, it works very will with the type of pill it is intended for -- a long, oblong pill. You have to very carefully place it in the cutter or you won't get a 50% cut on it, but it works very well for these.
If you are planning on using a round, small, or other shaped pill, you will not want to use this cutter as all it creates is a mess. (Again this is not the type of pill it is intended for use cutting.) However, I know for myself, do I really need an extra pill cutter around? This isn't a common sized pill for myself (and like I said, my mother passed between the time I applied to review this and the time the item arrived for review.) Even with her pills, I'm not sure I would recommend this as it only cuts one type of pill and has to be pressed so firmly with the palm of the hand. But if you have difficulty cutting long large oblong pills, this is the pill cutter for you.
I received one or more of the products mentioned above for free using Tomoson.com. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers.
Friday, March 14, 2014
100 oz of Diet Pepsi and Six other Quick Takes
1.
My current guilty pleasure is 100 ounces of Diet Pepsi. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately) my closest Sheetz Store doesn't have the Fizz City where I can add vanilla or lemon to my Diet Pepsi, but I take a few of the True Lemon packets and fill it up. First time I took this to RCIA, I asked the lady beside me if she could see the priest around the mug. The smaller mug is only 52 ounces. To fill up the larger one, it costs between 94 cents and $1.16 depending on where you go. My boyfriend bought me this mug at Christmas for $9.99 (first fill free) in Alabama. They aren't sold in my area and people are always commenting on my huge mug when I fill it up.
2.
I was in Wal-Mart looking at a shirt that said "Lucky" on Saturday. Not only is that the name of my guinea pig, but I enjoy entering contests and giveaways and have won several times. It seemed like a good "uniform" for next time I go to the national sweepstakes convention. As I was looking at it, a lady came up to my boyfriend and me and offered to give us the shirt we were looking at. It was only $5, and she didn't want to bother returning it! How cool is that?
3.
I am gathering supplies to start on a cross stitch project of Micah 6:8. It only says "Do Justice. Love Mercy. Walk Humbly." But it's beautiful. I figured I needed something to keep me busy after losing my mother. Things have been crazy. I wonder if life will ever get back to normal, and I learned there were a lot of lies told about me to my mother. I wish I could talk to my mother one more time.
4.
Twice this week my boyfriend have eaten dinner at the Catholic Church 10 miles away. The churches in that town rotate a free meal for anyone who wants to come every week. It ensures that everyone in the community has a hot meal once a week. There is a donation basket if you want to help with expenses and aren't needy, so it's a social time. Tonight we went and had their annual Lenten Fish dinner. For $8 we got a huge piece of fish on a sub roll, fries, stewed tomatoes, cole slaw, punch, and dessert. Well worth the $8. Plus it is even served to you -- no cafeteria style line, very much like a restaurant. And I saw my high school youth group choir leader there.
5.
We had to buy a new stove/oven. The glass cooktop on ours broke. My mother won it in a contest a few years back. It had been overheating since it broke and I didn't feel it was safe. The delivery man was a distant cousin. I pulled out the copies of photos I made for my mother's funeral and in one of them was my mom with his dad when they were about 10 years old. I gave it to him as a tip since it was a copy and I had the original.
6.
My boyfriend has taken to calling one of my fingernails "your gouger". I tell him it's a useful tool. He is threatening me with fingernail clippers. I told him it's only a matter of time until it tears.
7.
Life has been extremely hard for my boyfriend and me since my mom passed. Please keep us in prayer. And since life has been hard, I don't have a lot to write about at the moment, so I'll leave you with asking you to stop by my blog giveaway where I'm giving away to two winners -- each winner receives 2 coupons for Dial Deep Cleansing Hand Soap. (USA only). Just click HERE.
For More Quick Take Fridays, please visit http://www.conversiondiary.com
My current guilty pleasure is 100 ounces of Diet Pepsi. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately) my closest Sheetz Store doesn't have the Fizz City where I can add vanilla or lemon to my Diet Pepsi, but I take a few of the True Lemon packets and fill it up. First time I took this to RCIA, I asked the lady beside me if she could see the priest around the mug. The smaller mug is only 52 ounces. To fill up the larger one, it costs between 94 cents and $1.16 depending on where you go. My boyfriend bought me this mug at Christmas for $9.99 (first fill free) in Alabama. They aren't sold in my area and people are always commenting on my huge mug when I fill it up.
2.
I was in Wal-Mart looking at a shirt that said "Lucky" on Saturday. Not only is that the name of my guinea pig, but I enjoy entering contests and giveaways and have won several times. It seemed like a good "uniform" for next time I go to the national sweepstakes convention. As I was looking at it, a lady came up to my boyfriend and me and offered to give us the shirt we were looking at. It was only $5, and she didn't want to bother returning it! How cool is that?
3.
I am gathering supplies to start on a cross stitch project of Micah 6:8. It only says "Do Justice. Love Mercy. Walk Humbly." But it's beautiful. I figured I needed something to keep me busy after losing my mother. Things have been crazy. I wonder if life will ever get back to normal, and I learned there were a lot of lies told about me to my mother. I wish I could talk to my mother one more time.
4.
Twice this week my boyfriend have eaten dinner at the Catholic Church 10 miles away. The churches in that town rotate a free meal for anyone who wants to come every week. It ensures that everyone in the community has a hot meal once a week. There is a donation basket if you want to help with expenses and aren't needy, so it's a social time. Tonight we went and had their annual Lenten Fish dinner. For $8 we got a huge piece of fish on a sub roll, fries, stewed tomatoes, cole slaw, punch, and dessert. Well worth the $8. Plus it is even served to you -- no cafeteria style line, very much like a restaurant. And I saw my high school youth group choir leader there.
5.
We had to buy a new stove/oven. The glass cooktop on ours broke. My mother won it in a contest a few years back. It had been overheating since it broke and I didn't feel it was safe. The delivery man was a distant cousin. I pulled out the copies of photos I made for my mother's funeral and in one of them was my mom with his dad when they were about 10 years old. I gave it to him as a tip since it was a copy and I had the original.
6.
My boyfriend has taken to calling one of my fingernails "your gouger". I tell him it's a useful tool. He is threatening me with fingernail clippers. I told him it's only a matter of time until it tears.
7.
Life has been extremely hard for my boyfriend and me since my mom passed. Please keep us in prayer. And since life has been hard, I don't have a lot to write about at the moment, so I'll leave you with asking you to stop by my blog giveaway where I'm giving away to two winners -- each winner receives 2 coupons for Dial Deep Cleansing Hand Soap. (USA only). Just click HERE.
For More Quick Take Fridays, please visit http://www.conversiondiary.com
Sunday, March 9, 2014
Dial Deep Cleansing Hand Soap Review and Giveaway Ends 3/15
What cleans your hands, is pretty, and smells nice? It's not a trick question -- it's Dial Deep Cleansing Hand Soap. This is a premium soap with refreshing moisture, and it also has micro-scrubber. I remember when my Dad would come home from work he would need to scrub his hands, and back then he often had to use powdered soap. I wish Dial would have made this soap back then for him to wash away his work day -- and even though it's scented, it's not a girly scent so it's a great family soap. Plus it moisturizes! In fact, when my boyfriend smelled the Yellow Raspberry scent, he commented, "That smells great!"
Dial Deep Cleansing Hand Soap comes in three varieties. I was able to try "Water Blossom" and "Yellow Raspberry with Black Sugar". I can't wait to try "Coconut Lime Verbena".
Dial is a quality product and I remember my mother telling me that was the only soap I was to buy when I started grocery shopping for the family. I'm excited to see a new product to their line.
For the giveaway: Giveaway ends March 15. There will be two winners of two coupons each one good for a free deep cleansing hand soap from Dial. These coupons expire on March 31, so be prepared to use them immediately upon receiving them! (And winners must respond to the winning e-mail within 48 hours or another winner will be chosen.)
a Rafflecopter giveaway
Dial Deep Cleansing Hand Soap comes in three varieties. I was able to try "Water Blossom" and "Yellow Raspberry with Black Sugar". I can't wait to try "Coconut Lime Verbena".
Dial is a quality product and I remember my mother telling me that was the only soap I was to buy when I started grocery shopping for the family. I'm excited to see a new product to their line.
For the giveaway: Giveaway ends March 15. There will be two winners of two coupons each one good for a free deep cleansing hand soap from Dial. These coupons expire on March 31, so be prepared to use them immediately upon receiving them! (And winners must respond to the winning e-mail within 48 hours or another winner will be chosen.)
a Rafflecopter giveaway
Thursday, March 6, 2014
I Love To Read -- Even on the Go!
FTC disclaimer: This is a sponsored post. All opinions are my own.
U.S. Cellular offers a FREE PRINTABLE Parent Child agreement to help you discuss safety of the Internet, cell phone usage, limits, and courtesy with your teen or tween. You don't even need to be a U.S. Cellular customer to access this, although I have been for 10 years and highly recommend them.
I have always been a reader. When I was growing up, the summer reading program at our local library was the place where all the cool kids hung out -- at least I thought so because that's where I was! One year, the day of the party, another girl and I were tied at most books read. Instead of eating cookies, drinking punch, and watching a movie, we frantically read to beat the other to make the most books read! (She ended up beating me by one book!)
U.S. Cellular offers a FREE PRINTABLE Parent Child agreement to help you discuss safety of the Internet, cell phone usage, limits, and courtesy with your teen or tween. You don't even need to be a U.S. Cellular customer to access this, although I have been for 10 years and highly recommend them.
I have always been a reader. When I was growing up, the summer reading program at our local library was the place where all the cool kids hung out -- at least I thought so because that's where I was! One year, the day of the party, another girl and I were tied at most books read. Instead of eating cookies, drinking punch, and watching a movie, we frantically read to beat the other to make the most books read! (She ended up beating me by one book!)
Monday, March 3, 2014
The Dartboard of Grief and Suffering
I read this concept online at one point in time. I don't remember where it's from. It's so accurate I thought it was worth making a post about it. If anyone remembers the source, please let me know.
The concept is that the person suffering is the center. They can complain to anyone outside their circle of the bullseye. The next circle are those closest to that person. They can complain to everyone but the person in the center circle. It gets larger as the social network of people increase. For instance, someone in their church should not complain to an immediate family member that the suffering of the person in the center is so much they can't stand it. That person can complain to those outside their circle, but no one closer to the suffering.
I used this idea when my mother was in the hospital in August. I was terrified. I felt justified in anyone I let know how scared I was, etc. I never breathed a word to my mother how terrified I was because of her health. I was positive and upbeat around her. It sounds like common sense, but it is not. Because other people complained to her about her suffering and how it bothered them, she thought I didn't care.
The night my mother died, there were various "circles" of the bullseye in our living room. The paramedics comforted me through tears. I saw their own pain of losing a friend and co-worker. I have no doubt they cried once they left the house, but were strong for me.
When I arrived home (I was at church), a friend drove me home. He never met my mother, and he was a rock for everyone. My boyfriend wanted to protect me from what happened. There were others there to comfort my boyfriend, but I was in a circle closer to my mother than my boyfriend, although he was in a ring just outside me. In the last few months my mother became close with my boyfriend.
I am not saying you need to treat the suffering and grieving with kid gloves, but please do remember the circles. Be strong for those in the inner circles. Be someone they can turn to instead of you turning to them in your pain and grief.
Everyone handles grief and suffering differently. Just because someone appears stoic and like it doesn't bother them, that doesn't mean they aren't silently shedding tears when no one is around. It doesn't mean there isn't pure panic at times in the middle of the night. Just because they appear to be doing okay, don't assume that is really the case.
Ask what you can do. Be willing to help. Maybe even offer to do things. Someone called the day after my mother died and offered to clean our house. I didn't get the message until later, but many times offering something you can do is more appreciated than you can imagine.
The concept is that the person suffering is the center. They can complain to anyone outside their circle of the bullseye. The next circle are those closest to that person. They can complain to everyone but the person in the center circle. It gets larger as the social network of people increase. For instance, someone in their church should not complain to an immediate family member that the suffering of the person in the center is so much they can't stand it. That person can complain to those outside their circle, but no one closer to the suffering.
 |
| photo courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net |
I used this idea when my mother was in the hospital in August. I was terrified. I felt justified in anyone I let know how scared I was, etc. I never breathed a word to my mother how terrified I was because of her health. I was positive and upbeat around her. It sounds like common sense, but it is not. Because other people complained to her about her suffering and how it bothered them, she thought I didn't care.
The night my mother died, there were various "circles" of the bullseye in our living room. The paramedics comforted me through tears. I saw their own pain of losing a friend and co-worker. I have no doubt they cried once they left the house, but were strong for me.
When I arrived home (I was at church), a friend drove me home. He never met my mother, and he was a rock for everyone. My boyfriend wanted to protect me from what happened. There were others there to comfort my boyfriend, but I was in a circle closer to my mother than my boyfriend, although he was in a ring just outside me. In the last few months my mother became close with my boyfriend.
I am not saying you need to treat the suffering and grieving with kid gloves, but please do remember the circles. Be strong for those in the inner circles. Be someone they can turn to instead of you turning to them in your pain and grief.
Everyone handles grief and suffering differently. Just because someone appears stoic and like it doesn't bother them, that doesn't mean they aren't silently shedding tears when no one is around. It doesn't mean there isn't pure panic at times in the middle of the night. Just because they appear to be doing okay, don't assume that is really the case.
Ask what you can do. Be willing to help. Maybe even offer to do things. Someone called the day after my mother died and offered to clean our house. I didn't get the message until later, but many times offering something you can do is more appreciated than you can imagine.
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